What’s eating you slugger?

What is the cause of strife between brothers, friends and loved ones? In James 4: 1-3, the scripture narrows it down to the ego. Most quarrels originate from one individual taking offense because they wanted/expected something they did not receive; something physical like money or abstract like respect or love as well as the desires of a covetous heart. In general, feelings of bitterness have their origin in explicit, implicit or subconscious desires that have gone unfulfilled. We should, as Christians, practice the ability to control such emotions since we know that everything we want/have, we received from God. In asking, we should take into account certain factors: When we ask of God, it should be for the right reasons and a righteous end. When we do not receive, rather than examine our hearts for possible selfish reasons, we believe God has not answered our prayers or that the devil has stolen from us when really, it’s just that our request is not from a righteous heart or does not align with the will of God. James 4: 3 says we ask with wrong motives that we may spend on our own pleasures.


I don’t bear too many grudges because I am not surrounded by too many people but I have to admit to having been here many times. I would say my pride is the source of a lot of bitterness. Why does this person feel they can say this to me? Why didn’t this person listen to what I said? How could this person treat me this way? Why do is this person wasting my time? The bottom line is these questions would not be enough to generate any anger if I didn’t think so much of myself (ego). I pray that God helps me decrease, that I do not think so highly of myself to take offense when others don’t treat me a certain way.

So let us try not to harbor grudges, and when feelings of animosity or anger arise in us against our brother, let us ask ourselves, why am I angry? Is it my ego that has been bruised? Self evaluation can be the hardest but God will bless us with objectiveness that we can humble ourselves and not take offense unnecessarily. Remember, many insults were hurled against Jesus but he only took offense when his father’s house was desecrated.

May the spirit of gentleness and lowliness of heart live within us always.